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Thank you so much, BGB. I miss critiques =[

Oh I get it! Dyslyxia, right. Whoa, now that I'm thinking straight, I believe this is an accomplishment. I still think you could brush up some of the phrases, though. ...

I back these comments and, in addition: hid ing (den) in (behind) your eyes

*bites lip* Organ walls...like the walls of organs... You know, the intestine-y stuff. That was my point.

Thanks, Sam! I was rather proud of this poem, and I'm thankful for the input. I'd hate to say this, but it was actually pretty pessimistic. I was implying more ...

Memorable, yes. But unclear. For example - you start off with the "man in woman's throat" image, and do not return to it until the latter part of the poem. ...

This is way too abstract - I've read it over four times, and there are still sections that refuse to make sense. I'm sorry.

I appreciate your critiques, but I think Rosalina's actions are more than explainable. First of all, she is drunk. Secondly, she has born years of abuse from the Emperor and ...

I didn't want to comment on this, because I would have nothing to say. I frankly and simply enjoyed this.

We look shoulders over Personally, I'd just say the normal "We look over shoulders". It's direct.

Ethers “Fuck.” He was under his desk. The room vibrated again, dust shaking all around him landing in his mane of black hair. It was slicked back, but as somebody ...

A beautiful sentiment, but the only lines with any profound meaning were in the first stanza. In any case, I am sure that profound is not always the aim of ...

Hah. This is cute. When you say Ladder of Time, though, I think that's just way too blatantly obvious and a waste of a line. Oh, and I think it ...

The ending wasnt as strong. I have 15 minutes on a cafe computer and i sort of our conversations. i'll get back to this saturday night.

(What happened to us?) I especially love this addition. And you completely changed the middle. It added a new element to the poem, and I had to read it slowly ...